Saturday, December 31, 2011

looking back (and forward)

 so it may be cliche, but along with the rest of the blog world, i'm ready to lay out my resolutions for 2012. i know i've taken a week long break from blogging, and i promise there will be photos shared of our christmas morning and trips around visiting family. but obviously--we've been busy :) and i just haven't gotten around to doing that yet. so resolutions are happening first and i'll try to get the photos up in the next couple of days during nap times and after davis gets in bed.

there were several "end of year" wrap up stories on the news last night, and i couldn't help but notice the overwhelmingly pessimistic "good bye and good riddance" theme from these segments. it seems that to the general public, 2011 was this year that needs to be forgotten, moved on from and that (hopefully) 2012 will be a much more positive year for all.

in some ways, i agree. 2011 was a difficult year for our family--challenging, in both negative and positive ways. we had two major deaths in our family, other family members diagnosed with serious illnesses and/or hospitalizations, friends moving away, difficult financial periods and struggles with davis. we were tested on all fronts…and sometimes we weren't successful.

but other times, we were. professionally, i was able to move to a job with a more stable income and benefits--and i'm happy there, enjoying the challenges of working with a new population and becoming involved with campus life again. and as much as we may get frustrated with davis and his latest tooth he's cutting or his early wake-up calls, he has brought so much joy to our lives. without him, i know i wouldn't have handled my dad's death as well as i have. we witnessed so many of his "firsts" in 2011 that we will never experience again. we had wonderful vacations to the beach, visits with family and outings with friends. our day to day lives were happy, and our family has found our own little groove that works for us.

but there is always room for improvement and recognizing the opportunity for personal growth. and that's where i'm coming from as i look at my resolutions for the coming year. i know we are our own worst critics, but there are parts of my life that i gloss over because i know i'm not happy with it. where i remember other times in my life where i felt more confident about how i was doing at that point--and i know i'm not now. they've gotten pushed off to the "back burner," neglected while other areas that were more pressing were moved to the front.

and so here we go…

1) do the couch to 5k program and run in a 5k (most likely the pirate alumni road race in april--though there is one up near boone right around my great aunt and uncle's cabin in todd, nc, that is the first weekend in may that would be just awesome.) my plan is to run after davis goes to bed in our neighborhood, which has sidewalks and street lights. we'll see how that goes--it only requires 3 nights, which i can do. i can also alternative with an exercise dvd on the really cold/wet nights.

2) no more excuses with eating. cut out bad carbs, eat more fruits and vegetables, limit sugar intake. find a meal plan to works for me and stick to it.

3) hopefully the combination of these two will help me lose the last bit of baby weight, get back into my old wardrobe (or smaller) and feel more confident physically. i'm not used to (or happy) with the size i am right now and still haven't fully accepted that this is where i am. i will look at the size i'm in right now hanging on a store rack and think to myself "that's too big--that isn't what i wear, is it?" but it is--and it fits--for now. hopefully not for long!

4) find a small group or Bible study groups that works for our schedule and allows us to feel connected to the church and growing in our personal faith. what we're currently doing isn't working--davis just can't handle an evening event on a regular basis, and when i take him with me, i don't get anything out of it because i'm chasing him. i think we're to the point where we need to take turns watching him and each going to our own groups. i also got some information about an online study through proverbs 31 ministry reading through the book "made to crave" and want to do that in january and february.

5) finish our photo books for 2010 and (now) 2011. make better decisions about choosing photo jobs and spacing them out so i'm not overwhelmed with editing.

6) continue doing date nights with justin at least once a month. we just had our first night away from davis since he's been born (more about that trip soon!)

7) find ways to volunteer and give back to the community. i know that sounds vague, but i'm hoping it will get some direction as time goes on.

8) be better about sticking to our budget and work towards saving for our 5 year anniversary trip this year (still need to decide where we're going and starting planning…it's in april)

and the perfectionist side of me wants to find a 9 and 10 cause 10 is just such a nice round number, but i'd be stretching it and i feel like these 8 do a good job of showing where i am and what i want my focus to be for 2012. more on personal health, on relationships, on faith. so much has changed since i've become a mom, and i know that it's an excuse i could use--or i could say that because of davis, i need to take care of myself even more so because he's looking up to me and he wants a mom that's healthy and happy and can run around with him as he grows.

so what are your new year's resolutions? any suggestions or encouragement as i get started on mine?

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